The War Before the Peace: How to Find Peace with the Past

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." — John 14:27

We all want peace. Real peace—the kind that quiets the soul and calms the storms within. But few of us are willing to admit the uncomfortable truth: there is no peace without war.

Before peace becomes a still place you can rest in, it must be fought for. You can’t experience peace until you’ve encountered what disturbs it. And you can’t fully appreciate light unless you’ve stood in the dark.

Many people think peace means the absence of conflict. But the kind of peace Jesus offers us doesn’t avoid conflict—it transcends it. It meets us in the middle of our mess and walks us out of it. Like a soldier who trains for battle and then chooses not to fight, we become people of peace after we’ve faced the war within.

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Why Peace Feels So Elusive

The truth is, we don’t always know why we feel unsettled. We call it anxiety. Or depression. Or confusion. But often, these are just symptoms of a deeper issue: a lack of peace in one of three places—our past, our future, or the present moment.

When we haven’t made peace with the past, it follows us like a shadow. It whispers through our regrets and second-guesses, our what-ifs and should-haves. This is where depression often takes root—not just in sadness, but in unresolved grief and guilt. We replay the old stories, trying to edit them with today's wisdom, as if that would heal them.

But peace doesn’t come from rewriting the past. It comes from surrendering it. From believing that when God says you are a new creation, He really means it. That what’s covered by grace is no longer yours to carry.

And then there’s the future—that place we obsess over, trying to control what hasn’t even happened yet. Anxiety thrives in that space. It feeds off the illusion that if we think enough, plan enough, or worry hard enough, we can protect ourselves from pain. But Jesus gently reminds us, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.” Worry adds nothing. Trust, on the other hand, builds everything.

But maybe the hardest battle is right here in the present. When you’re not at peace in the now, your sense of self becomes foggy. You lose clarity. You lose identity. You forget who you are because you’re so busy reaching backward or forward that you miss the sacred stillness of now. And it’s in the now where God speaks. Where healing happens. Where peace is offered, again and again.

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The Warrior Who Chooses Not to Fight

I often think about the metaphor of a professional fighter. Someone who’s trained, disciplined, strong. Not just physically—but mentally. Emotionally. Spiritually. He knows his power. He knows what he's capable of. And that knowing—that confidence—allows him to walk away from most fights. He doesn't react to every threat. He doesn't need to. His peace is not weakness. It's power under control.

That’s what I believe God wants for us. Not just to survive, but to be warriors of peace—people who’ve gone to battle with our demons, who’ve wrestled with truth, who’ve faced our fears and our pasts and our deepest wounds, and have come out the other side not bitter, but free.

It’s not that we never feel fear or anger or grief. It’s that we’re no longer ruled by them. Peace doesn’t mean we’re untouched by pain—it means we’re anchored through it.

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Becoming a Peacemaker, Not a Peacekeeper

There’s a reason Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers.” Not peacekeepers—peacemakers. Keeping peace can mean keeping the surface calm, even if everything underneath is falling apart. But making peace? That’s a whole different thing. That’s holy work.

Making peace means looking your past in the eye and saying, “You don’t own me anymore.” It means surrendering your need to control tomorrow, trusting that God is already in it. It means being still long enough today to remember who you are—and whose you are.

It’s choosing to put down the sword, not because you’re weak, but because you’ve already won the most important war: the one inside of you.

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The Journey Ahead

If you're walking through a season where peace feels far away, you're not alone. But I want to encourage you—you’re not failing, you’re forming. God isn’t disappointed in your struggle. He’s present in it. He’s near to the brokenhearted. And He is always, always working to bring you into wholeness.

You might be in the war right now. But peace is coming. And when it comes, it won’t just be the absence of chaos. It will be the quiet strength of a soul that knows it’s loved. Chosen. Forgiven. Secure.

So take heart. Keep walking. Keep healing. And remember:

Peace isn’t found by avoiding the war—it’s found by walking through it with God at your side.